How can I long for something I have never even seen or experienced? It’s 1am and I just can’t go to bed. God told me a few days ago that I have a mission and that He is going to take away the distractions.

I prayed the powerful prayer and asked Him to remove all of it – I might not know what they are but do it anyway, whether I end up hurting or not. Well, despite that I miss home.

Sounds weird but I just feel so homesick. I am right where I need to be, I know it. I am on the verge of making a very big change in my life. But for some reason I just miss my home.

I’m sitting in a house, yes – but it isn’t home. This world is beautiful, broken but beautiful, yet it is not my home. I crave to be with You, Lord. I know I am young and I have yet to accomplish many things and make a positive impact in this world but I just want to be with You.

Free from any worry or pain. I feel it every night, Lord. I feel the pain of others, I feel the child unhappy in his home. I feel the person being physically hurt, I don’t know them. I want to help but I don’t know how. How do I help them?

You gave me a gift – a talent. I will do my best to use it and hopefully it will help someone out there. Just anyone, even if it is one person.

But other than that, I am not perfect and if I had to die today I don’t truly know if I will have a seat at Your table in Heaven. But tonight, I crave Your presence, I crave to be with You.

I just want to go back home.